Letting Down The Walls
by Ila9182
Summary: If someone had said to Andy Flynn three years ago that he would have been friendly to Sharon Raydor, that he would have cared about her, he would have laughed at the absurdity. And now here he was, behind a closed door, worrying about her and eavesdropping on a private conversation. A 1x07 "The Shame Game" between-the scenes one-shot, Flynn-centric.


**Hi everyone! Here I am again with another one-shot! This time, a 1x07 "The Shame Game" between-the scenes one-shot that takes place during and after Sharon and Provenza inform Rusty about his biological father. When watching the episode, I felt that there was something missing after the "notification" and again, Mary's brilliant acting inspired me to write this piece.**

 **I still have the same personal request as in my previous fic: NO SPOILERS since I'm still watching season 5 (and so far, I loved every bit of it). Thank you, I appreciate that.**

 **Big shout-out to my Beta, eelise187, who patiently and quickly proofread my work and helps me every time to improve my stories and my English!**

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 **LETTING DOWN THE WALLS**

Andy Flynn was walking down the hallway in search of the Captain. He had a file in his right hand, and was looking to inform her of his findings. However, she wasn't in her office, or the Murder Room, he had even looked for her in the break room where Tao told him he had seen her walk away with Provenza. Andy furrowed his eyebrows, wondering what they were up to and if it had anything to do with Rusty and his biological father.

Flynn was with Sharon when Cynthia informed them that DCFS had found Rusty's father, he was also standing next to her when Rusty showed up and they had to come up with a lame excuse to prevent him from entering the break room to get a soda. He was the one to point out to Cynthia how contradictory it looked that Daniel Dunn only showed up after 16 years claiming he was Rusty's father. Whether he wanted to be or not, he was involved in this situation and being supportive of Sharon actually felt right. It felt like it was the right thing to do, even if he couldn't quite explain why.

He was about to give up on his search and head back to the Murder Room to wait there when he heard yelling. He stopped right away and even though he couldn't quite figure out what was being said, he recognized Rusty's voice. He walked closer to the door and that was when he heard her voice. "Let me explain. When DCFS found out about Daniel Dunn, they became legally obligated to tell him about you."

"So that's why Cynthia was here. Did she bring this guy with her? Is…is he in the break room? He is, isn't he? He is in the break room, and that is why you guys wouldn't let me in to get my soda, because I am the sensitive family problem you have."

Andy heard Rusty speak again. He closed his eyes and sighed. Sharon was informing the kid about his biological father and it was turning out as Andy had expected it would. Bad. He was sure Rusty wouldn't take the news well, and he couldn't blame him. The kid had been through a lot and this so-called father showing up was only adding more drama to his life, just when he was settling down, thanks to Sharon.

"Cynthia thought she was doing you a favor by bringing Mr. Dunn here." Sharon stated simply .

"No! You stop it, Sharon! She was doing a favor for you! She was not doing a favor for me! Great! The rules win! Now you can get rid of me, and it's not your fault!" Rusty yelled.

Andy froze, his breath caught in his throat. He felt badly for Sharon. He knew – the whole team knew – how important the kid was to her, and as much as he understood Rusty's anger – he was hurt and afraid of what would come next – him yelling and being mad at Sharon was wrong, very wrong. She had been nothing but good to him and Andy couldn't imagine how she was feeling in that uncomfortable situation. Hurt, defeated, broken… In that exact moment, Flynn only wanted to open the door, to step in and to defend his Captain. She didn't deserve to be treated that way.

"I am not trying to get…" she responded, raising her voice and Andy could sense the hurt in it. He wished he could do something, but before he had the time to think about it, he heard Provenza's voice.

"Okay. That's enough. That's enough! Now, you know that I am not friends with this woman, but if she wanted to get rid of you, she could have dumped you in a group home months ago."

He was relieved she wasn't in there alone, that she didn't have to face Rusty alone on that delicate subject. He was glad Provenza was there, surprisingly taking the Captain's side, but he kind of wished he had been there instead of his partner. He wasn't sure he would have found the right words to say to Rusty, but he would have had Sharon's back. He smirked, thinking about how odd this whole situation was. If someone had said to him three years ago that he would have been friendly to Sharon Raydor, that he would have cared about her, he would have laughed at the absurdity. And now here he was, behind a closed door, worrying about her and eavesdropping on a private conversation. He frowned, thinking about how wrong it seemed. It was none of his business and as much as he wanted to be sure Sharon was okay, this wasn't the best way to find out. He was about to walk away when he saw the door open and heard Rusty repeating how sorry he was.

"I know. I know." He heard Sharon practically choke out in response, and before he could do something, she rushed out of the room, startling him and nearly knocking him down. She didn't stop and he wasn't sure she had even noticed he was there. He saw her quickly walk away, a hand covering her eyes and her heels echoing down the hallway. He could sense her anxiety and uncertainty in how she walked away.. Andy heard Provenza talking to Rusty inside the room, but he didn't pay attention to what they were saying. He was totally focused on the Captain and before she was able to fully disappear down the hallway, he decided to follow her.

He saw her enter the conference room and close the door behind her. He quickly walked in that direction and stopped just in front of the door, suddenly unsure of his next move. It was obvious she needed some time alone to recompose herself, but it didn't feel right to simply walk away and ignore what had just occurred. After spending a few seconds debating with himself about what to do, he closed his eyes, took a deep breath and knocked on the door. When he didn't get an answer, he slowly opened it and stepped inside, closing the door behind him.

"Captain…"

She was standing still, with her back to the door and she didn't move when he called to her. He wasn't sure she heard him, so he moved closer and whispered again, "Captain…"

She flinched, but still didn't turn around. She simply answered with an unsteady voice, "Yes, Lieutenant Flynn?"

In that moment, he felt that anything he would have said to her would have been stupid. The file he was holding in his hand had suddenly become the lamest excuse he could use to check on her.

"I…uh…I was looking for you… Mike gave me the list of all the victim's emails. He sorted the most important ones in the first three pages…"

"Thank you, Lieutenant," she stated without turning around. Then motioning her arm toward the table, "Please, leave the file on the table. I'll check it later."

Flynn knew the main reason why she wasn't turning around to face him was because she was still unable to control her feelings. Having told her about the list of emails, he had no other excuses that would explain why he was still standing in the middle of the room staring intently at her. He had two choices now: to leave or to stay, and if he was choosing to stay, he'd better find something clever to say because him staying silent wasn't an option. He put the file on the table before whispering, "Captain, are you alright?"

 _Well, how clever, man. Are you alright? Really?! Couldn't you come up with something better to say?_ he asked himself.

He was expecting her to tell him to get lost, to leave her alone, or to mind his own business, but she didn't. She stayed silent for what seemed to Andy like an eternity. He heard her breathe in before she finally answered, "I've been better, truth to be told."

"Is there anything I can do for you?" he asked sincerely.

"I highly doubt it, but thank you for asking." She quickly answered.

He could sense the pain in her voice. He could feel how difficult it was for her to pronounce every word without her voice breaking down. He wished he knew what to say to make her feel better, but he had no clue…and with her having her back to him it wasn't the easiest way to have a normal conversation.

"Listen Captain, I know it's none of my business but… I was looking for you earlier and I heard yelling and I…uh I wanted to be sure everything was alright… I…uh I didn't mean to eavesdrop, but…"

Sharon slowly and hesitantly turned around to face him, finally allowing him to see her face. Her eyes were glistening with unshed tears and she was biting her bottom lip in a desperate attempt not to cry. Flynn expected her to kick him out of the room this time, especially after admitting he had been eavesdropping. Surprisingly, she smirked sadly before saying, "I kind of imagined that you being here wasn't a mere coincidence."

"Do you want to talk about it?" he simply asked, with an encouraging tone.

"I wish I could…" she said with a broken voice.

She lowered her eyes, not wanting to show him how vulnerable she was. She wasn't ready to show that side of herself, not after all the efforts she had done to gain the respect of the team. Besides, her relationship with Andy Flynn had been anything but simple. They spent the last three years confronting one another and yelling at each other. He had been nothing but despicable, but lately they seemed to have settled down, with him being surprisingly trustworthy and good at the job. She didn't want to ruin all the progress they had made by breaking down in front of him.

"Look, you didn't do anything wrong. We all know you do everything you can for the kid…but this whole situation with DCFS informing Rusty's father is the law and as much as it sucks, there's nothing you, well, we can do about it."

Sharon closed her eyes and took a deep breath while a single tear slowly ran down her left cheek. She nervously wiped it away before saying with a trembling voice, "He accused me of wanting to get rid of him…"

Flynn moved forward, closer to her. Hearing him coming nearer, she looked up to meet his eyes and once he was sure he had her attention, he said with a smooth voice, "That wasn't him talking, but the anger. He said that because he's hurt and afraid of what will come next, and you know that. People say the worst things when they're angry and they do regret it later. Believe me, I know what I'm talking about, I've done that so many times I've stopped keeping track. Deep down, the kid knows you care about him and I'm convinced that he didn't mean to say those things to you."

He could see more tears collecting in her eyes and he started wondering if he had said the right words or if he had only made things worse. She didn't seem to feel better but he didn't know if she was feeling worse or if she was simply letting her walls come down, allowing him to see more of her worry and stress over the situation.

"I'm sorry…" she whispered.

Andy frowned, not understanding why she was all of the sudden apologizing. He looked deeply in her eyes as if he could find the answer in them, but he could only see her piercing emerald eyes glistening with tears.

"For what?"

"You shouldn't see me this way…" she whispered looking down.

She kept playing nervously with her hands, staring at them while she was trying to calm down her breathing. The last thing she wanted was to break down in front of him. She had let him see way too much and crying wasn't something she wanted to add to the list. She bit her bottom lip and closed her eyes.

"Hey… what's wrong about it?" he asked with a weak smile.

Before he realized what he was doing, he placed a hand on her shoulder. It felt like the natural thing to do, like a reflex of the nervous system. She seemed surprised at the touch, as she looked up to meet his eyes again. He expected her to take a step back, but she didn't. Instead, she just kept looking at him and he added, "We all have our bad days, we all hurt… You've seen me at my worst and it wasn't even close to this."

He meant it as a joke but she didn't react. She really had seen him at his worst. She had seen his irascible and aggressive side – actually more than seen, she had experienced it first hand God knows how many times – she had even seen him hurt when he got attacked after an AA meeting and he nearly collapsed on her when she met him at the ambulance to collect his statement.

"Still. I know better… I'm your Captain and…"

"You're human…" he interrupted her. "Nobody expects you to be a heartless robot, I don't expect you to be like that. I won't think less of you if you tear up after an emotional day. You're a hell of a Captain, sure a pain in the ass, but you're damn good at the job."

She smirked at his remark and surprisingly didn't contest his choice of words. They stayed in silence for a few minutes; his hand still on her shoulder and Andy was surprised to notice that there was nothing odd about the situation. It actually felt right. He could feel Sharon starting to relax under his touch, her breathing slowing down and her tears starting to slowly disappear from her eyes.

"Thank you, Andy…" she finally said, breaking the comfortable silence between them.

"Anytime, Captain." he replied with a small smile.

Flynn squeezed her shoulder and then pulled his hand back to his side. He walked away and was about to open the door when he stopped and turned back around, "And…uh…I don't know if anyone has ever said this to you before, but you're doing a terrific job with the kid. Rusty is lucky to have you and I'm sure he knows that."

Sharon smiled truthfully for the first time since he had entered the room. She didn't say a word, couldn't say a word as she was too moved by Flynn's words. She nodded and Flynn gave her one last smile before leaving her alone in the room. She watched the door close behind him before she opened the file he had left for her on the table and began to read the emails. She quickly realized there was nothing in the file relevant for the case – she knew that Andy was aware of that as well – and she smiled when she understood that he used this as an excuse to check on her.

 _What had happened to the grumpy, irascible and disrespectful Andy Flynn?_ she wondered. She wasn't complaining though, she liked the new Andy Flynn much better.

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 **Please R &R: let me know what you think about it. I'd appreciate it very much. Thank you! :)**


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